Just some rants

I woke up this morning feeling this is the last day of my life. Possibly because of lack of sleep.  I recently get no sleep every other day because of my withdrawal reaction and irritable sticky eyes.
So I went to see my GP, which I don't do often, and said I've got several things I want to discuss - my sticky eye condition, depression and insomnia. He said that he cannot discuss all in 10 minutes. 10 minutes rule. I forgot about it. This is something I wasn't familiar with until I came to England. Yes, I totally understand that NHS is free and there're other people waiting, so you should keep it all your business up to 10 min. Efficient, I like efficiency. On the other hand, I couldn't help but crying with sadness.

It is mentally hard for me to even go outside and be in public because of how I look. I'm tired of going to see different doctors and get nothing but TS (I'm doing this repeatedly for 6 years for god's sake) - however this morning I still felt I needed some support from a medical professional. My GP is nice, but I still cannot get what I desperately needed. Health.

From my experience, when my withdrawal condition improves, it happens like a magic. One day you are not so itchy and your skin starts to heal more quickly than you would ever imagined. After 2 weeks or so, it's all clear. It wasn't relevant to seasons, weathers, what I eat or things I do. It felt like my skin suddenly remembered how to heal. I'm waiting for the moment. 

My mind is everywhere today. Hope tomorrow will be a better day.


  1. My GP is so lovely, we are lucky. She gives us as long as we like. The downside to that is that she is ALWAYS late when we go to see her!


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